The Rosa Chronicles: The Ups, the Downs, and the Wardrobe Changes

I need to start with this picture, because it epitomizes the way I have been feeling lately. That heavy cloud has been following me for a long time already... Yep. Just like Eeyore, I have been feeling like a fat, gray cloud has been following me for a long time, and I don't seem to be able to shake it off. It has been two weeks since I started taking meds, and still, the therapy does not seem to be working. I spoke to my doctor yesterday; like I mentioned before, I am grateful to have a doctor that listens to me and takes my opinion in consideration. At first, she thought that the best course would be to up the dose of Paxil, but upon talking and discussing other factors that I feel have a lot to do with what I am feeling, she agreed that we should look at other options that may alleviate my condition. I won't go into details about that now because I am still working on that, but I am almost certain that this will really provide the relief that I am so craving and that

I did not get to write my blog last week, and this week, I have been struggling for the past hour or so to get to do it. No, it is not that I am lazy; I am just battling with a really bad bout of depression that has given me a good kick in the butt, and that is resisting every attempt I make to shake it up. It all started after my return from vacation. I could not face going back to the work routine after having had such a relaxing and wonderful vacation. But it lingered a bit longer, and things got worse. First were the headaches, then came the anxiety. After this came the lack of energy, not being able to get up in the morning, not wanting to do anything but being a total couch potato, spending hours watching TV, which by itself should have been a sign because those of you that know me personally know that I don't watch TV at all. Then I wanted to sleep all the time, but after a couple of hours of sleep, I would wake up in the middle of the night and not be able to go back to s

I am sorry to report that as of today, I have not started the 12 week shape up challenge. I am still having lots of trouble adjusting to the daily routines. Honestly, it has been the hardest time ever; never have I had such difficulty coming from vacation and picking up where I left off. This time around, however, it has been so, so hard! I have difficulty getting up in the morning and getting ready to go to work; I have no motivation to do so. And when I come home, I am so tired that I just want to take a bath and relax; no energy or intention to workout. I think of all the reasons why I should, but nothing has made me move from my comfy couch to the gym...I figure it will come, sooner or later. Meanwhile, I have been enjoying other things, taking care of other business that are equally important. For example, Amanda, my oldest daughter, is graduating from high school in about two months. Not only that, she is also turning 18 and going to college! I can't believe it; to me, it w